Monday, July 28, 2008

Embracing The Curls

Some of you have seen this before on one of my other blogs. Deal with it. It won't kill you to read it again.

All my life, I've had curly or wavy hair and I've sat under blowdryers and flat irons for hours at a time several times a week to turn it into "normal" pin straight hair. I've even paid people to do this for me. My right bicep is slightly bigger than my left bicep, and I think it's because I've wielded a large brush in that arm every day for years, attacking the curls and flattening them with no mercy. In short, I've spent my entire life praying for straight hair. "Dear God, please give me straight hair. Oh, and world peace."

This week, I'm happy to announce that I've "embraced the curls." I'm embracing the crazy side, the wavy side, the unkempt side.

So if I'm a little too loud, or a little too funny, or a little too smart, or even a little too crazy, don't be scared. That's just me. And when you see the girls in the bars with the crazy wavy hair, remember that they're probably the ones who were up all night partying the night before and didn't have time to straighten their hair the next morning. In fact, they're lucky they make it into work the next day. And not only do they make it into work the next day... they rally back and party harder the next night. They're the ones who know how to have a good time and they're the ones you'll be sorry you're not talking to because you're too busy trying to pick up the "normal" girls. I have news for all the guys out there: the normal ones are actually the psycho ones. The crazy ones are actually the normal ones. The people that wear their crazy right out there in front... those are the girls who know who they are and where they come from and where they're going. Nothing surprises us. We've been through a lot and we've learned to put the crazy right out there for everyone to see. When it comes to us, what you see is what you get. We know what we'll stand for and what we would never stand for. We're not easily offended, but when we are we'll call you out on it.

So, if you want a nice, quiet, prim and proper girl... don't bother talking to the girls with the beach hair at the bar, because we're the ones that will challenge you and force you to stay on your toes. Our hair is unruly and so are we. However, we can also attend a family function of yours and make your parents fall in love with us, win over your uncles and your nieces, and then go shot for shot with you at the after-party. If you don't want that, stay far, far away. But if you're looking for a great time with a great girl who has great friends... seek out the girls with the curls. For some reason... we're just more fun.

This is not to say that there aren't awesome straight-haired girls out there, because there are. My friend Katie B. comes to mind. She's got the mouth of a sailor and the biggest heart you'll ever be fortunate enough to find a place in. She'll be your best friend (with a loyalty that's unsurpassed) and she'll drink you under the table. She knows exactly who she is and what's going on, and she's amazing. She's also got pin straight hair, which blows my theory to shit.

So, here's the deal (and try to pretend that I'm not starting every paragraph with "So"...) You just have to keep your eyes out for the best girls. They're not going to fall right into your lap -(that's a different kind of girl.) Chances are, the best girls aren't the supermodels (although we do clean up well), they're not the bitchy ones (although if you go there, we will too) and they're not the quiet ones (but we know when to shut up.) I applaud the men that find women like us attractive and fabulous, because the bottom line is... we're a piece of work, but we're worth it... and we know it. And the best part is, we think the men who can handle us are worth it too.

6 comments:

Dad said...

So, can I get reimbursed for all the chemical's. and electicity that was used over the 20 some odd years that it took you to figure this out The bill is in the mail.

Jennifer said...

Ummm... no.

teeny said...

Let's hear it for the curls. I'm such a square. I'm ready for the hazing to begin to initiate me into the bad girls club.

Jennifer said...

Let's start tonight. You can be like Rihanna - "good girl gone bad."

Melissa said...

"I have news for all the guys out there: the normal ones are actually the psycho ones. The crazy ones are actually the normal ones. The people that wear their crazy right out there in front... those are the girls who know who they are and where they come from and where they're going. I LOVE this!!! This is so true!!! I always tell Tim..you KNEW what I was like when you asked me to marry me!!! So true! He always smiles because he knows it's true! I never changed...I've always been the crazy fun girl since our first date.

Jennifer said...

Now Tim will spend the rest of his life making sure Emma isn't the crazy fun girl that you've always been! :) How is the little pumpkin?

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